One thing for sure i have learned in life
you can call it wisdom if you want
is that it won't turn out anything like you planned
wanted
imagined.
that changed my life
i was a planner
a thinker
a lister
and i had been taught we should do that
now i am not so sure
now i think
maybe
we need to work instead -
on refining our attitude and reactions to be Christlike.
that is - for me - actually a much harder task
than planning
preparing
doing
to have life happen in a way you hate
to be torn and broken
destroyed
and remain Christlike
that is not easy
that does not come naturally
i think one's time would be better devoted
to preparing for that eventuality
than to attempt to control life
because you can't
at some point it surely has to occur to you
that you are so far from in charge
that it isn't even funny
well,
if you live in reality
i think it must
so ~
my life philosophy
such as it is
has changed
from a path model
to a reaction model
from an action model
to a reaction model
perhaps respond is a better word.
reactions tend to not be our best foot forward
response seems more thought out
and that is the greatest wisdom of my 50 years
not really sure what that says about me
but i think maybe i wish someone had told me that a long time ago
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